Squirting or ‘female ejaculation’ is something many people hear about and become curious about, but it’s also surrounded by a lot of confusion and myths. It’s completely normal to feel unsure or even a bit scared to try it, especially if you’ve read conflicting information.
What is squirting?
Before diving into how to do it, let’s first talk about what squirting actually is. Female ejaculation, also known as ‘squirting’ refers to the release of fluid from the urethra during sexual arousal or orgasm.
Squirting isn’t always linked to an orgasm, so it can occur with or without it.
The term ‘squirting’ refers to the experience of a large amount of liquid being expelled at once – sometimes in a gushing or ‘squirting’ fashion.
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The term ‘female ejaculation’ tends to refer to a smaller amount of liquid being released.
Biochemical testing shows ejaculate is different to urine and lubricating fluids (which are usually more sticky) It’s actually similar to prostate fluid in men and contains fructose. The fluid comes from the Skene’s glands, sometimes called the “female prostate,” which are located near the urethra. When stimulated, these glands can release a fluid that is clear or milky in appearance.
That being said, there is some debate about large amounts of liquid being released, with some researchers believing large amounts of fluid may be a combination of ejaculate and diluted urine.
But you know what, if it feels good, so what?
What does squirting feel like?
Squirting is different for every person, and not everyone experiences it. Women often describe it as a unique feeling of orgasm and release.
However, because squirting often involves new kinds of stimulation at first, it can feel a little uncomfortable when you’re learning.
Many women also describe the feeling of needing to pee right before they squirt, which can sometimes make them uncomfortable.
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Common misunderstandings about squirting
It’s easy to get confused by the myths surrounding squirting, so let’s clear up some of the most common misunderstandings:
- It’s nothing to be embarrassed about. Some women notice that they ejaculate without meaning to and can unfortunately feel embarrassed about it. It’s totally normal and there’s nothing to be embarrassed about.
- It’s not something everyone can do: Just like not everyone experiences orgasm in the same way, not everyone will squirt, and that’s perfectly normal. Others, like yourself find that they can learn how to ejaculation once they get the right information and instructions.
- You don’t need to squirt for sex to be satisfying or fulfilling: Squirting doesn’t necessarily lead to a more intense orgasm or more pleasure. It’s simply another flavour of pleasure to explore.
That being said, if you want to try it, I highly recommend it. So let’s look at exactly how you can do it.
Here’s how to squirt from a sexologist and sex therapist
As a sexologist and sex therapist I’ve helped teach many women in therapy and my online programs how to squirt – after first teaching myself.
You can practice this by yourself or with a trusted partner.
Here are the steps that I’ve found work best
- Put down a towel or waterproof blanket: This can help easy any anxiety you feel about making a mess and help you relax and let go.
- Don’t put pressure on yourself: Keep in mind that sex can be highly enjoyable whether you squirt or not. Approaching this with curiosity and an open mind can help ease any pressure.
- Relax and get comfortable: Squirting often happens when you’re deeply relaxed. Create an environment that helps you feel at ease — whether that’s a quiet space, dim lighting, or some music.
- If you’re with a partner, make sure you have great communication: Sometimes as you’re exploring something new you can experience physical or emotional discomfort. Agreeing on a safe word with a partner can help you feel comfortable knowing that you can stop things at any time.
- Build arousal slowly: Take your time to build arousal. The more comfortable and turned on you feel, the more likely squirting is to happen. Aim for at least 20 minutes of ‘warm up’ before moving forward.
- Explore G-spot stimulation: Squirting is often linked to stimulating the G-spot. You can try using your fingers or a specialised G-Spot toy to apply pressure to the upper wall of your vagina, about 2-3 inches inside. Include clitoral stimulation too.
- Push out slightly at the moment of orgasm: At the moment of orgasm bear down (push out) slightly.
- Persistence is key: Learning to squirt might take some time, practice and patience, but it can open a whole new world of enjoyment.
Isiah McKimmie is one of the most qualified relationship and intimacy experts in Australia. She’s passionate about supporting people to have happy relationships and playful sex lives. Isiah offers relationship counselling and sexology to individuals and couples and offers effective online programs for those who just need some extra guidance.
