Even though it’s easier than ever to shop for sex toys online and IRL, it’s also totally normal if you feel overwhelmed with options, don’t have the budget to splurge on the latest rabbit vibrator, or simply feel uncomfortable using a toy, whether alone or with a partner.
Whatever your reasoning, making the switch to sex toys can be daunting—no matter how active your sex life is. But don’t worry, because you already have access to the ultimate sex toy: your thighs.
Syntribation is a discreet way to masturbate that requires no hands, fingers, batteries, chords, or even lube. All you have to do is squeeze your thighs, says Rachel Zar, PhD, LMFT, a certified sex therapist at Avid Intimacy in Chicago.
Now, if you’re thinking, ‘There’s no way it’s that easy to climax’, you’re right—you can’t just cross your legs and have an orgasm (if only). But, it doesn’t take a sexpert to nail this masturbation technique.
‘Syntribation is hands-free, so it can be done in a variety of settings, and is accessible for those who might have difficulty using their hands for masturbation’, says Zar. You can also try it with other pleasurable activities, either by yourself or with a partner (more on that later).
While the technique might take some practice, Zar says that syntribation isn’t as complicated as other masturbation approaches out there. So, if you want to up your self-pleasure ante without splurging on a new toy, grab a pen and paper because you’ll want to jot these sex therapist-approved recommendations down for later.
Meet the Experts: Rachel Zar, PhD, LMFT, is a certified sex therapist at Avid Intimacy in Chicago. Kimberly Thomas, LPC, CST, is a certified sex therapist at Transformation Space Therapeutic Services, LLC in Virginia.
What is syntribation, exactly?
Syntribation is a hands-free masturbation technique that vulva owners have used for decades. ‘This technique is done by crossing your legs and squeezing your thighs together, often combined with some rocking or grinding to stimulate the clitoris and vulva‘, says Kimberly Thomas, LPC, CST, a certified sex therapist at Transformation Space Therapeutic Services, LLC in Virginia.
Squeezing your thighs—especially if you’re also flexing your pelvic floor muscles—brings blood flow to your genitals, increasing overall arousal and pleasure. ‘For those with a vulva, the clitoris is more than just the little nub (or the glans) you see at the top of your labia’, Zar explains. ‘It actually extends internally along the sides of your vulva, hence why any kind of thigh squeezing can feel really good to your entire vagina.’
While syntribation is mainly a technique used by women, men can certainly give it a try, too. ‘Penis owners are able to achieve pleasure by tucking their penis between their thighs and squeezing the glans or head of the penis for stimulation’, says Thomas. That said, syntribation might become more difficult once the penis is erect, Zar adds.
If you’ve utilised this technique before, it’s likely you came across it by accident—perhaps when you were younger and experimenting with masturbation for the first time. It’s very common for people in adolescence to discover the action of squeezing their thighs for pleasure unintentionally and then continue doing it, Zar says. ‘Even before young people are able to register that squeezing their thighs together is a sexual act, they lean into it just because it feels good’, she adds. ‘Don’t be afraid to borrow this technique in your adult life—committing to pleasure regardless of how you find it is a healthy mindset as you evolve sexually.’
What are the benefits of syntribation?
This masturbation technique provides plenty of perks, both physical and mental. For starters, ‘syntribation can add a layer of mystery and excitement to your sex life, whether you’re doing it alone or with a partner(s)’, Thomas says. Other benefits include:
1. It’s discreet
Many methods of self-pleasure aren’t exactly subtle (think: using a wand vibrator you can hear from the next room), but the most notable green flag of syntribation is its discretion. Whether you live with roommates or are on a family vacation, you can go for the big O while going undetected. Just make sure you have ample privacy before engaging in syntribation, because while it is low-key, it is still masturbation. ‘Please keep in mind that people around you are not consenting to being around you as you masturbate, so opt for more independent settings’, Thomas adds.
2. It’s easy for newbies, as well as people with limited mobility
Syntribation is also incredibly beneficial for sexually inexperienced people, or even those who don’t feel connected to their genitalia, Thomas notes. This method takes the pressure off knowing exactly what to do with your hands and allows you to just focus on what feels good, and how you can feel better. And once you develop new sexual preferences, you can feel confident in using them with a partner or during other forms of masturbation.
‘Syntribation is also a safe way to explore your own sexuality, build familiarity and comfort with your sexual self, and gain sexual confidence’, Zar adds. With that in mind, syntribation also allows for people with physical disabilities that impact their ability to touch themselves to still experience sexual pleasure manually, Thomas says.
3. There might be (mental) health benefits, too
While no studies have been completed on syntribation yet (it isn’t even an official dictionary word), it’s been known to help reduce cortisol levels and release feel-good hormones like dopamine, endorphins, and oxytocin because it falls under the larger umbrella of masturbation, Zar says. Like more traditional masturbation practices, it’s also a surefire way to relieve stress and improve your mood, Zar adds, citing a recent study from the International Journal of Sexual Health.
4. It can be versatile
Syntribation ‘can easily be done in conjunction with other pleasurable activities, including using your hands on a partner, using a vibrator on your vulva, touching your clitoris, or even while having intercourse—for example, if your partner is behind you in a spooning position‘, Zar says. Think of it as a Swiss army knife of self-pleasure—always a useful item to have in your toolbox.
How can I try syntribation—and make it even hotter?
If you’re ready to give your favourite vibrator a vacation (she deserves it), consider adding syntribation to your masturbation rotation the next time the mood strikes. And don’t reserve all the fun for your individual play time—you can use syntribation with your partner(s), too.
- Try it with a pillow: ‘If vibrating is too overwhelming of a sensation, you can also place a pillow or a folded blanket in between your thighs to increase the pressure’, Zar adds. Cross your legs around the soft object, grind, roll your hips, and let loose.
- Try it with your clothes on: It’s also important to note that syntribation can be done with or without clothes on for both penis and vulva owners. The friction of clothes can provide additional stimulation to the vulva or clitoris, Thomas says.
- Try it in the bath or the shower: ‘Lie or stand in a comfortable position and let the soapy water offer a more slippery sensation’, Zar says. This is also recommended if you tend to experience chafing between your thighs. And whether you have a vulva or penis, trying syntribation this way will prove to be the most comfortable, thanks to the water.
- Try it with a vibrator: If you like the sensation of vibration when you masturbate, try placing a vibrator against your vulva or between your thighs before you syntribate and use your thighs in addition to the vibration for increased intensity, Zar says.
- Try it during foreplay, a.k.a. before you engage with a partner: Syntribation can be a fantastic warmup. ‘Getting the blood flowing between your legs will allow you to already be aroused and primed for increased pleasure right from the start’, Zar says. You can also use syntribation to incorporate edging into a sex sesh, Thomas adds. ‘Edging is a practice used to extend sexual pleasure before orgasming, so, between changing positions, you and your partner can engage in mutual syntribation to keep the sexual tension alive’, she says.
- Try it during intercourse: First, position your partner behind you, either while you’re in a spooning position or lying flat on your stomach, Zar says. ‘Cross your legs once they’ve inserted themselves to get the sensation of intercourse in addition to the pressure from syntribation’, she adds.
So, the next time you leave the self-pleasure aisle empty-handed or open your nightstand drawer to find your go-to vibrator completely dead, don’t panic. You don’t need it anyway—you have your thighs.
This article originally appeared on Women’s Health U.K.
